Coping After Tragedies, Happy New Year 2015
It has been a few weeks since I last wrote a post, not having a phone or a laptop since the week of the robbery & house fire has made it almost impossible to do. I can not believe that it has been almost three months since that horrible car accident, the house break-in, and the house fire. It seems like it was so long ago; yet feels as if it was just this past weekend. The kids and I are still having nightmares, it has been so difficult for all of us to figure out how to just move on. I know that no one ever imagines themselves ever being homeless, but what a wake up call this was!
(If you are a new visitor to our blog, our posts are here:
“In one week our car was totaled, our house robbed, and our house caught on fire”
“Rebuilding Our Lives”)
The first and second week after that terrible week I was coping very well. I was smiling as I spoke to every one, I was feeling a great deal of happiness, and of course gratefulness. Every one I spoke with about that week; was shocked, sad, even uncomfortable because they didn’t know what to say. I even had a woman feel so bad, that she couldn’t stop apologizing and giving me reusable shopping bags, lol! I smiled every time and told them not to be sorry or feel bad. I was surprisingly the happiest I had ever been. That smile? Was of the immense gratefulness and happiness that my children were safe and alive. At any given time during those three tragedies; they could have been physically injured. Saying that as an answer to people’s “how can you smile at a time like this?” questions felt great.
This third week felt very different. Maybe it was shock, or adrenaline, or insanity; but it all wore off. Reality hit me just as hard as the kids and I hit that center divider. Suddenly it has been weeks of depression, relief, anxiety, fear, sadness, anger, happiness, gratefulness, questions, and Prayers.
Watching my son go into regression (Autism), his nightmares, his emotions, his everything; I have gotten calls from the Special Needs school he attends about his daily behavior, his coping skills, and it stinks that I can’t just go and pick him up because his school is 1 hour away. My Husband has had nightly nightmares, I see his PTSD just hugging him tight order xanax doctor again. I know having emotions and break-downs is normal, especially after such tragedies; but no one said I had to like it 😉
We still have not been able to come up with funds to buy a car, or to get a place to live; let alone to replace any furniture or anything else we lost. Christmas was definitely a reflection of our circumstances, our kids went from having tons of presents on Christmas mornings; to only getting one toy, one outfit and shoes, don’t get me wrong. They are completely grateful, they still said it was a great Christmas; but you know that as a Mother it kills my heart to not be able to give them the things they not only need but deserve.
New Year’s Eve is tomorrow, part of me wants to scream at midnight, tell 2014 to go kick rocks, write on a piece of paper all the bad things that happened and burn them;
Then the part of me who is overwhelmed just wants to sleep the celebrations away and wake up to a New Year. We will see tomorrow what life brings, in the meantime…
I am hoping so much that the New Year treats us so much better than 2014 did.
Wishing that 2015 treats YOU better, I wish nothing but Blessings and smiles for your Families; and everything else that you have been waiting for 😉
Thank you to everyone that has Prayed for us, Donated, Messaged, Hugged us; we appreciate it greatly.
To those of you who have asked how you can help by donating and/or sharing, below are things we have been told to make so people can help…
I received a few emails that people did not want to use fundly, gofundme, or the paypal donate button because they take a fee from the donation; so I was asked to please give my paypal address so the money can be gifted to us. I appreciate the support with all my heart, the paypal address is:
Or paypal donate is:
thank you so much from the bottom of my heart!
I was asked to place this link below so people can help write to Ellen, she helps people who desperately need a car; and we desperately NEED one 😉
You can include the link to our post in the submission so she can read our story… please 😉